Sorry, I haven't written since I got back from vacation. The cruise was good, not awesome, not terrible. All in all, I did alright on the eating plan (my weight last Monday at ww was 159.5 - so I was down from my last weigh in). I really don't have much to write about with it though. I refuse to complain in my online journal about a vacation that many people would kill for. I enjoyed spending some time with my family, enjoyed good food and wine, got minorly sunburned, and read 6 books. That about covers it.
This week the big change is that the 'rents are back from Florida. I wasn't expecting them until more like mid-month and thought I wouldn't have a lot of sharing the house time after their return. I was wrong. They came back last Wednesday, and its taking a bit of getting used to. I'm just not accustomed to someone wanting to talk to me at 7:50 as I eat my bowl of Kashi, watch reruns of Charmed, check my email, and get out of the house by 8:10. I'm not used to people wanting to know if I'll be home for dinner. I'm not used to having to think about when I can do laundry because other people are using the washer. I'm not used to parking on the curb and having to brave the rain. Really, so far the talking in the morning thing is the biggest problem. My mom has had several conversations with me already that I don't really recall at all. She talks, I grunt, and apparently she thinks that we have communicated about something. I'm not a morning person. The nice thing is that they make me coffee in the morning - I think its to make me more of a human being.
Oh, one more thing I'm not used to, the body image comments from my mother. This morning, she asked me "Oh, so I see you are wearing the size 8 pants today." I responded that I wasn't, that I was wearing the size 10 pants (not something I'm either happy or proud about). I didn't ask her, but I immediately began wondering what she meant by that comment. So much so that when I got to work, I asked one of my coworkers if my pants looked too tight on me. Was my mom trying to tell me that my pants looked to small and I needed to move up a size? Was she trying to say that it didn't look like I was wearing the ginormous size 12 pants (I didn't own size 10 pants - yes they are all the same, gotta love ann taylor triacetate - when she left to go to Florida so I either wore the kinda small on me size 8s or the way big on me size 12). I don't know. Having her here commenting on the way I look, what I'm wearing for makeup, and my clothing choices is really bad for my self image.
To make the sharing the house time longer, I was a nice person and told my future landlord that we would be ok with moving in a little over a week late because the current tenant is having problems with the house he is building. This means that I need to come up with ways to be out of the house. This weekend, I'm headed to Memphis to catch a AAA baseball game, drink some beer, eat some BBQ, and maybe hang out a little on Beale Street. Next weekend, I'm thinking a possible trip to Chicago. I recently figured out that I have to stay here for Memorial day weekend because my godparents' daughter's (and one of my best friends from childhood's) wedding is that Saturday. I had been thinking of a trip either to NY to visit my friend Courtney or ABQ to visit Elisabeth. Now neither of those trips will happen for a little while.
The one other trip option I'm thinking about right now is for the first weekend in June (my last weekend living with the 'rents). There is this bike trip in Southern Illinois. I've never done a bike trip before, and this one looks really doable for me. Its on a rails-to-trails bike trail and you ride 35 miles a day. 35 miles is longer than any of my rides last year (longest I did was about 30), but I really think 35 is not unreasonable, especially since we wouldn't really be doing hills (rails-to-trails). The price is reasonable considering it includes lodging and some food. I've got to make a decision by May 10 if I want to register, and I really think I might. Its the kind of thing I've wanted to do for a while. Any thoughts?
Weight: 160.5 (home scale - I don't like it, but its that time of the month so whatever)
Worked out 3 days this week with some minor running. Its amazing how quickly you lose the leg/lung power. But, part of it was the one of those runs was in 90 degree temps and you all know how I feel about running in the heat (ICK!)
Friday, May 04, 2007
Friday, April 20, 2007
Vacation time
This week I have only run 2 days. One day was the half marathon and the other was just a quick jaunt on the treadmill on Wednesday night. I didn't get a workout in yesterday, and I don't regret it a bit. Instead, I had a fantastic date with a really interesting guy. Not exactly rocket science to decide what I enjoyed more. True, I could have done both, but I didn't think I had time last night. Tonight, I probably won't get a real workout (by real, I mean cardio) in either because my feet have a happy appointment with a pedicurist. I've gotten over my fear of ridicule for my non-contagious (according to my doctor and webmd) bacteria infection. My toes are gonna look pretty on the cruise. That's right- for those of you who don't know, I won't be posting for a while because I will be sailing my stress away in the Caribbean. Not that I'm stressed compared to my friends at law firms.
I'm actually really concerned about this cruise. If I have learned anything about my eating habits, it is that I tend to eat like a crazy person around my family or an all-you-can-eat buffet. Either of these situations usually results in me gaining between 2 and 5 pounds (I wasn't kidding when I said I eat like a crazy person). Since the cruise will combine my family with all-you-can-eat food, nothing good can come of this. I do have a plan, but I always have a "plan" for these situations. The problem is actually following the plan.
The plan: Eat fruit and egg for breakfast, salad for lunch, fruit or veggies for snacks, and relative free reign for dinner (meaning I can order dessert and drink wine). It also includes taking at least an hour for fitness a day whether hitting the treadmills, the stationary bike, the track, or the lap pool in addition to whatever activity I naturally get (aka snorkeling or SCUBA diving). Its a good plan. I just have to stick to it. I don't want to come back and have none of my clothes fit. I'm already heavier than I would like to be, and I refuse to allow this vacation to make me feel bad about myself.
So, any suggestions? Anybody face the cruise ship and won?
Weight: 159.5
I'm actually really concerned about this cruise. If I have learned anything about my eating habits, it is that I tend to eat like a crazy person around my family or an all-you-can-eat buffet. Either of these situations usually results in me gaining between 2 and 5 pounds (I wasn't kidding when I said I eat like a crazy person). Since the cruise will combine my family with all-you-can-eat food, nothing good can come of this. I do have a plan, but I always have a "plan" for these situations. The problem is actually following the plan.
The plan: Eat fruit and egg for breakfast, salad for lunch, fruit or veggies for snacks, and relative free reign for dinner (meaning I can order dessert and drink wine). It also includes taking at least an hour for fitness a day whether hitting the treadmills, the stationary bike, the track, or the lap pool in addition to whatever activity I naturally get (aka snorkeling or SCUBA diving). Its a good plan. I just have to stick to it. I don't want to come back and have none of my clothes fit. I'm already heavier than I would like to be, and I refuse to allow this vacation to make me feel bad about myself.
So, any suggestions? Anybody face the cruise ship and won?
Weight: 159.5
Thursday, April 19, 2007
shoes...sigh...
I've been thinking about a pair of shoes lately. They were the perfect pair of summer sandals. They were cute and black and strappy and the heels weren't too high and the heels weren't too low. They looked great with a sexy dress or with work pants. They never caused blisters. They packed really easily. People were constantly complementing me on them.
These shoes didn't leave me because they went out of style, no, they died a glorious death that involved rubber bands, masking tape, dancing barefoot, and Boston. Its a night I won't soon forget, but it ended with my beloved shoes in a trash can. Its been over a year since that fateful night, and I haven't found any shoes to replace them. All the replacement shoes just can't live up - they cause blisters (I'd don't get blisters from running these days...noooo...just from damn uncomfortable shoes), the back strap falls off, they are too high, or too platformy. They just aren't perfect.
I told one of my coworkers about the perfect shoes the other day because they are the only shoes I have ever worn until they literally fell apart. Ever since then I've been thinking of those shoes. Today I decided to search for them. Maybe zappos could give me back my perfect shoes or ebay. Alas, its not to be. While the shoes are available on ebay, they aren't in my size. Anybody know what the name of those shoes is? It might help with the search. I think I need to move on...sigh...
Weight: 159.5
No running today
These shoes didn't leave me because they went out of style, no, they died a glorious death that involved rubber bands, masking tape, dancing barefoot, and Boston. Its a night I won't soon forget, but it ended with my beloved shoes in a trash can. Its been over a year since that fateful night, and I haven't found any shoes to replace them. All the replacement shoes just can't live up - they cause blisters (I'd don't get blisters from running these days...noooo...just from damn uncomfortable shoes), the back strap falls off, they are too high, or too platformy. They just aren't perfect.
I told one of my coworkers about the perfect shoes the other day because they are the only shoes I have ever worn until they literally fell apart. Ever since then I've been thinking of those shoes. Today I decided to search for them. Maybe zappos could give me back my perfect shoes or ebay. Alas, its not to be. While the shoes are available on ebay, they aren't in my size. Anybody know what the name of those shoes is? It might help with the search. I think I need to move on...sigh...
Weight: 159.5
No running today
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
life is weird
So last night I continued my trend of picking up guys in weird places. This time was in the sauna of a gym I never go to but had paid for day pass so I could swim laps. I had just gotten done with forty-five minutes of swimming - nothing too strenuous, but a nice relaxing free style. Generally, I find swimming boring since you can't really listen to music while swimming (I don't have a waterproof ipod case), but yesterday's swim was pretty great. It helped me clear my mind and get through the general sadness that has been hanging over me since the events of Monday. Anyway, went into the sauna to sweat a little more and dry my hair a little bit (yeah I know that's weird too...but being in the sauna feels good). I ended up staying so I could talk to this guy - he was pretty nice and made me laugh. I couldn't have looked worse either - I had that ratty swimming hair. My face was completely red from being in the sauna. In other words, I did not look hot.
Nothing serious here cause the boy is leaving for boot camp (Marines) in less than a month, but that doesn't mean I can't have a little fun. Maybe the best part was that it came out in conversation that I am much thinner than I used to be. This is maybe the first time that I have told people about my weight issues from the beginning. It kinda feels nice being up front about this. Anyway, having dinner with him tomorrow.
:-D
Miles: 2.8 (30 minutes)
Weight: 160
Nothing serious here cause the boy is leaving for boot camp (Marines) in less than a month, but that doesn't mean I can't have a little fun. Maybe the best part was that it came out in conversation that I am much thinner than I used to be. This is maybe the first time that I have told people about my weight issues from the beginning. It kinda feels nice being up front about this. Anyway, having dinner with him tomorrow.
:-D
Miles: 2.8 (30 minutes)
Weight: 160
Monday, April 16, 2007
St. Louis Half Marathon
I did it. It was an incredible experience, and I will try to do it justice here. What surprised me the most was how emotionally invested I became in the race.
First, I have to say how glad I am that Cathy agreed to run the race with me and fly out here this weekend. If I hadn't known she had signed up, bought an airline ticket, and was coming, I might have bailed on this race when my original running partner dropped out. Although I didn't run the entire race with her, she made this race for me. I can't imagine doing it without her.
As for the race, I'll try my best to relive the experience here:
Before the race started it was a very chilly morning in the low to mid 30s. Luckily the sky was totally clear; Saturday had been a day of rain, all day. It was cold and windy and wet and would have been horrible to run in. Sunday would turn out to be perfect. We were cold at the starting line, dressed in layers with trash bags and gloves we had picked up at the expo on Saturday. A couple of cute boys were lined up behind us, and we did some chatting with them. I had overheard them saying that they aimed to finish the half in less than 2 hours, so I knew they would drop us immediately after we crossed the starting line.
The race started promptly at 7 a.m. I had never experienced a race like this one before. We were pretty far back so the race started, and we stood still, waiting. We got to take two steps forward, but then we waited some more. It was almost 10 minutes before we got to the starting line. That's when the race began for real. I sort of set the pace for Cathy and I, a nice slow jog at about a 12 minute mile. We got passed by a bunch of people, but we also passed a bunch of people. We were neither the fastest nor the slowest people out there. Before we had even reached the first mile marker, we had shed our trash bags. I felt good - my legs didn't feel tired, my knees didn't hurt, and being part of that crowd was pretty amazing. As we headed down into Soulard, I shed my gloves and just kept going. There's a pretty major uphill before the run through the brewery (the the AB Clydesdales), and we walked a good portion of that hill. Smelling the hops as we flew down the hill inside the brewery was pretty awesome. I love the smell of beer brewing - its a combination of yeast and hops and smells as pretzelly and like home to me.
At about mile four I figured out that I needed to pee. I headed over toward some port-a-potties, but the line was too long and I didn't feel like stopping and waiting just yet, so we kept running. As we headed back to mile 6, which is pretty close to the start, I started to get emotional. The water stop woman sort of said some encouragement with my name (my name was on my number cause I registered early), and I almost lost it. For the first time, I found myself close to tears, and I had no idea why. I felt great. I didn't feel like I had already run 6 miles. I felt as fresh as if I was just starting a training run.
About this time, I noticed that we were hearing names being called. We were running pretty close to where the finish line would be, and we could hear as each of the early finishers came through. We watched them run past us in the opposite direction. For me it was incredible. I'll never be that fast. I don't envy them really and they don't make me feel bad about what I've accomplished. Instead they make me feel good. We were training at the same time, and we were running on the same course. They are truly impressive people and deserve accolades and it is a wonder to watch them run.
About that time we found empty port-a-potties, and I got my pee - THANK GOD!
Right about mile 7 Cathy and I parted ways. She hadn't done much training on hills, and most of my training was done on much hilly conditions than the race course. She needed to walk up the hills and I enjoyed running up them. I felt bad for leaving her, but I really wanted to do my best.
Shortly thereafter, I started running next to an older gentleman. He would be my companion until mile 9.5 when the marathon course split from the half marathon course. He was probably in his mid-seventies and had completed a marathon in all fifty states. St. Louis was his 10th marathon of 2007. Oh, and he was walking. His walking pace was the same as my running pace. We chatted and I got to hear about his life experiences. I learned that he had a total knee replacement and than 15 days later (15!!) he had completed a 5k. 8 weeks later he had done a full marathon. He was an astounding person, and I'm so glad I got to have the experience of meeting him and hearing his story. I don't run races with my ipod on, and that's part of the reason why. I wouldn't want to miss the race experience - chatting with random new people (like that man or the women I met who were also running their first half marathon). Hearing the random bagpipe player, folk band, or acoustic guitarist is part of what makes running a race so much fun. Its more than just running 13.1 miles - its about experiencing those miles.
I almost lost it again a little after mile 10. I was starting to feel tired, the sun was blazing in my eyes, and I was warm. That's when I saw my friends Heather and Mark, cheering for me. I'd never had anyone come out to cheer for me before that wasn't family. I'm tearing up right now just thinking about it. I waved frantically at them as I went past, all the while doing my best to keep from sobbing with joy. If I had started crying, I wouldn't have stopped, and if I was sobbing, I wouldn't have been able to breathe. This would not have been good.
At mile 11, a group of guys had set up a stand giving out beer. Ahh - living in a city that is the home of beer. I passed because I didn't want to take in anything at that point that I hadn't trained with - I didn't need to have stomach problems in the last few minutes. I found out later that Cathy gladly accepted a beer - gotta admit that after a run, nothing tastes quite as good.
I felt great going into the last couple miles. The hills seemed like nothing, and I knew I was almost there. There actually were crowds to cheer you on. I've got to admit that to some extent the people saying "don't give up, you're almost there" were a bit patronizing to me. I know they mean well, but no way was I going to give up. At that point walking wasn't an option, I knew I had this thing in the bag. The only thing that hurt on me were my feet (which was a new experience for me).
Somewhere between mile 10 and 12, I started getting passed my the fast marathon runners. They were incredible. It was awesome to hear the crowds cheering for them, telling them how great they were doing. They knew they were out of contention for first, but like me, at this point for them it was a race against the clock. I have no desire to run a marathon myself, but I am constantly astounded by that feat. It lifted me up to see them charge past me in those miles.
When I came to the mile 26 sign I knew I had more in me so I sprinted the finish line. I finished within seconds of a marathon runner, and it was pretty dang cool to hear his name get announced over the loud speaker. He was number 12 of all marathon finishers.
I lost it again when they placed the finishers ribbon around my neck. This time I allowed myself to cry a little - I think they might have thought I was in pain, but those were tears of pure joy and pride. I never would have believed that I could do it, that I could run a half marathon, before I started trying. The fact that I am not a natural runner, could hardly run at all as a child, and yet have achieved something so amazing makes me believe in the ability of the human spirit. If I can do this, what limits really are there for me?
Miles: 13.1 (chip time 2:39:25)
First, I have to say how glad I am that Cathy agreed to run the race with me and fly out here this weekend. If I hadn't known she had signed up, bought an airline ticket, and was coming, I might have bailed on this race when my original running partner dropped out. Although I didn't run the entire race with her, she made this race for me. I can't imagine doing it without her.
As for the race, I'll try my best to relive the experience here:
Before the race started it was a very chilly morning in the low to mid 30s. Luckily the sky was totally clear; Saturday had been a day of rain, all day. It was cold and windy and wet and would have been horrible to run in. Sunday would turn out to be perfect. We were cold at the starting line, dressed in layers with trash bags and gloves we had picked up at the expo on Saturday. A couple of cute boys were lined up behind us, and we did some chatting with them. I had overheard them saying that they aimed to finish the half in less than 2 hours, so I knew they would drop us immediately after we crossed the starting line.
The race started promptly at 7 a.m. I had never experienced a race like this one before. We were pretty far back so the race started, and we stood still, waiting. We got to take two steps forward, but then we waited some more. It was almost 10 minutes before we got to the starting line. That's when the race began for real. I sort of set the pace for Cathy and I, a nice slow jog at about a 12 minute mile. We got passed by a bunch of people, but we also passed a bunch of people. We were neither the fastest nor the slowest people out there. Before we had even reached the first mile marker, we had shed our trash bags. I felt good - my legs didn't feel tired, my knees didn't hurt, and being part of that crowd was pretty amazing. As we headed down into Soulard, I shed my gloves and just kept going. There's a pretty major uphill before the run through the brewery (the the AB Clydesdales), and we walked a good portion of that hill. Smelling the hops as we flew down the hill inside the brewery was pretty awesome. I love the smell of beer brewing - its a combination of yeast and hops and smells as pretzelly and like home to me.
At about mile four I figured out that I needed to pee. I headed over toward some port-a-potties, but the line was too long and I didn't feel like stopping and waiting just yet, so we kept running. As we headed back to mile 6, which is pretty close to the start, I started to get emotional. The water stop woman sort of said some encouragement with my name (my name was on my number cause I registered early), and I almost lost it. For the first time, I found myself close to tears, and I had no idea why. I felt great. I didn't feel like I had already run 6 miles. I felt as fresh as if I was just starting a training run.
About this time, I noticed that we were hearing names being called. We were running pretty close to where the finish line would be, and we could hear as each of the early finishers came through. We watched them run past us in the opposite direction. For me it was incredible. I'll never be that fast. I don't envy them really and they don't make me feel bad about what I've accomplished. Instead they make me feel good. We were training at the same time, and we were running on the same course. They are truly impressive people and deserve accolades and it is a wonder to watch them run.
About that time we found empty port-a-potties, and I got my pee - THANK GOD!
Right about mile 7 Cathy and I parted ways. She hadn't done much training on hills, and most of my training was done on much hilly conditions than the race course. She needed to walk up the hills and I enjoyed running up them. I felt bad for leaving her, but I really wanted to do my best.
Shortly thereafter, I started running next to an older gentleman. He would be my companion until mile 9.5 when the marathon course split from the half marathon course. He was probably in his mid-seventies and had completed a marathon in all fifty states. St. Louis was his 10th marathon of 2007. Oh, and he was walking. His walking pace was the same as my running pace. We chatted and I got to hear about his life experiences. I learned that he had a total knee replacement and than 15 days later (15!!) he had completed a 5k. 8 weeks later he had done a full marathon. He was an astounding person, and I'm so glad I got to have the experience of meeting him and hearing his story. I don't run races with my ipod on, and that's part of the reason why. I wouldn't want to miss the race experience - chatting with random new people (like that man or the women I met who were also running their first half marathon). Hearing the random bagpipe player, folk band, or acoustic guitarist is part of what makes running a race so much fun. Its more than just running 13.1 miles - its about experiencing those miles.
I almost lost it again a little after mile 10. I was starting to feel tired, the sun was blazing in my eyes, and I was warm. That's when I saw my friends Heather and Mark, cheering for me. I'd never had anyone come out to cheer for me before that wasn't family. I'm tearing up right now just thinking about it. I waved frantically at them as I went past, all the while doing my best to keep from sobbing with joy. If I had started crying, I wouldn't have stopped, and if I was sobbing, I wouldn't have been able to breathe. This would not have been good.
At mile 11, a group of guys had set up a stand giving out beer. Ahh - living in a city that is the home of beer. I passed because I didn't want to take in anything at that point that I hadn't trained with - I didn't need to have stomach problems in the last few minutes. I found out later that Cathy gladly accepted a beer - gotta admit that after a run, nothing tastes quite as good.
I felt great going into the last couple miles. The hills seemed like nothing, and I knew I was almost there. There actually were crowds to cheer you on. I've got to admit that to some extent the people saying "don't give up, you're almost there" were a bit patronizing to me. I know they mean well, but no way was I going to give up. At that point walking wasn't an option, I knew I had this thing in the bag. The only thing that hurt on me were my feet (which was a new experience for me).
Somewhere between mile 10 and 12, I started getting passed my the fast marathon runners. They were incredible. It was awesome to hear the crowds cheering for them, telling them how great they were doing. They knew they were out of contention for first, but like me, at this point for them it was a race against the clock. I have no desire to run a marathon myself, but I am constantly astounded by that feat. It lifted me up to see them charge past me in those miles.
When I came to the mile 26 sign I knew I had more in me so I sprinted the finish line. I finished within seconds of a marathon runner, and it was pretty dang cool to hear his name get announced over the loud speaker. He was number 12 of all marathon finishers.
I lost it again when they placed the finishers ribbon around my neck. This time I allowed myself to cry a little - I think they might have thought I was in pain, but those were tears of pure joy and pride. I never would have believed that I could do it, that I could run a half marathon, before I started trying. The fact that I am not a natural runner, could hardly run at all as a child, and yet have achieved something so amazing makes me believe in the ability of the human spirit. If I can do this, what limits really are there for me?
Miles: 13.1 (chip time 2:39:25)
Saturday, April 14, 2007
one more day
In about 15 minutes, I'm leaving to pick Cathy up from the airport. I'm bringing my digital camera, and we're gonna go do the St. Louis sites today. So exciting. The race is tomorrow and today we are going by the expo to get our packets then grabbing lunch and going up in the arch. I think a brewery tour might also be in store. YAY Cathy visiting!
Thursday, April 12, 2007
a different kind of women's issues
This month's edition of Runner's World actually raised an issue I've been meaning to write about for a while - women in running. Amazingly, I think a lot of people in my generation are completely unaware of how much this sport has changed for women in the 30 years or so. It used to be believed that distance running hurt women's reproductive abilities. Women weren't allowed to even try to prove that they could handle running. No one believed we were capable of doing it.
Not until 1971 were women officially allowed to enter the Boston marathon. There wasn't a women's Olympic marathon until 1982 - 1982!! Today, its recognized that women can handle long distance running, and in fact, women may excel at distance running even more than men. Unlike many other sports, in ultra-marathons, women can actually beat men. For example, Pam Reed has won the Badwater Ultramarathon twice.
It makes me realize that my running is also a proud feminist statement. I'm not just taking care of myself, but I'm continuing to stand up for my right to run. Just like I can't imagine being held back in my career by my sex, I can't imagine being held back in my ability to run a race because I'm a woman. Within my lifetime, this is such a major change. Its hard for me to even imagine the world as it was for those trailblazers in the 60s and 70s. It makes me feel responsible to stand up for what I believe in. The world won't change unless somebody makes it. This is also why women's races are so important. Its not that we should exclude men, its more that we need to recognize how much women have overcome. The women's movement has revolutionized our world as much as the civil rights movement did, and I think its important to acknowledge that history. Women were and still are a disadvantaged group. We should be proud of our achievements.
I also think its interesting to note that the rise of women in running also correlates to the decline in elite running. I never hear that women are to blame for this decline, but perhaps that is part of what is underlying the argument that slow runners are degrading the sport. Over shorter races women generally are slower. The advent of running as an activity to stay in shape is probably pretty connected to women. Again, that's not a bad thing. Women have changed the sport, and those women who did deserve all of our admiration.
Weight: 158
Miles: 3 (treadmill 32:40)
Not until 1971 were women officially allowed to enter the Boston marathon. There wasn't a women's Olympic marathon until 1982 - 1982!! Today, its recognized that women can handle long distance running, and in fact, women may excel at distance running even more than men. Unlike many other sports, in ultra-marathons, women can actually beat men. For example, Pam Reed has won the Badwater Ultramarathon twice.
It makes me realize that my running is also a proud feminist statement. I'm not just taking care of myself, but I'm continuing to stand up for my right to run. Just like I can't imagine being held back in my career by my sex, I can't imagine being held back in my ability to run a race because I'm a woman. Within my lifetime, this is such a major change. Its hard for me to even imagine the world as it was for those trailblazers in the 60s and 70s. It makes me feel responsible to stand up for what I believe in. The world won't change unless somebody makes it. This is also why women's races are so important. Its not that we should exclude men, its more that we need to recognize how much women have overcome. The women's movement has revolutionized our world as much as the civil rights movement did, and I think its important to acknowledge that history. Women were and still are a disadvantaged group. We should be proud of our achievements.
I also think its interesting to note that the rise of women in running also correlates to the decline in elite running. I never hear that women are to blame for this decline, but perhaps that is part of what is underlying the argument that slow runners are degrading the sport. Over shorter races women generally are slower. The advent of running as an activity to stay in shape is probably pretty connected to women. Again, that's not a bad thing. Women have changed the sport, and those women who did deserve all of our admiration.
Weight: 158
Miles: 3 (treadmill 32:40)
Monday, April 09, 2007
guilt
Today's run was really bad. It started out great and ended just terribly.
I'll start with the worst first. I almost hit a bicyclist on my way out of the park. I was entirely at fault. I just didn't see him until I almost pulled right into him. I know that is no excuse, and I'm so grateful that he started screaming at me as soon as he saw me pulling out. It probably saved his life. As a bicyclist, I'm horrified by this, mortified really. Is there really a hand gesture that's appropriate to say, "ummm...sorry I almost hit you, really glad you aren't dead?" or "screaming at me is totally appropriate, and I'm a moron." I don't think I found the proper response (well, other than slamming on my breaks and not hitting the guy). It still freaks me out; I just wasn't expecting a bicycle to come flying around that corner. Next time I will be.
Then there was the run itself. I started having to pee about a mile in. So every restroom I came to, I tried to go in to use. Only they were all locked. As I came up to the third restroom, I crossed a rock path and ran up the grass. No luck, so I was going to keep heading done the path. I jogged back towards the running trail, needing to cross the rock path (aka drainage ditch) again. I didn't do it so well the second time. I turned my left ankle and fell almost flat on my face. My ankle hurt, my hands hurt, and one of my knees hurt. I decided it would be better to walk back to my car than to finish the run. After walking for about 5 minutes, I realized that my knee and ankle felt fine, so I ran back to the car. I only ran about 4 today, but I didn't want to risk greater injury at this stage in the game. My only lasting damage are some cuts on my hand. I think the distraction from feeling slightly injured may have created some of my stupidity when I was leaving the park.
I'll start with the worst first. I almost hit a bicyclist on my way out of the park. I was entirely at fault. I just didn't see him until I almost pulled right into him. I know that is no excuse, and I'm so grateful that he started screaming at me as soon as he saw me pulling out. It probably saved his life. As a bicyclist, I'm horrified by this, mortified really. Is there really a hand gesture that's appropriate to say, "ummm...sorry I almost hit you, really glad you aren't dead?" or "screaming at me is totally appropriate, and I'm a moron." I don't think I found the proper response (well, other than slamming on my breaks and not hitting the guy). It still freaks me out; I just wasn't expecting a bicycle to come flying around that corner. Next time I will be.
Then there was the run itself. I started having to pee about a mile in. So every restroom I came to, I tried to go in to use. Only they were all locked. As I came up to the third restroom, I crossed a rock path and ran up the grass. No luck, so I was going to keep heading done the path. I jogged back towards the running trail, needing to cross the rock path (aka drainage ditch) again. I didn't do it so well the second time. I turned my left ankle and fell almost flat on my face. My ankle hurt, my hands hurt, and one of my knees hurt. I decided it would be better to walk back to my car than to finish the run. After walking for about 5 minutes, I realized that my knee and ankle felt fine, so I ran back to the car. I only ran about 4 today, but I didn't want to risk greater injury at this stage in the game. My only lasting damage are some cuts on my hand. I think the distraction from feeling slightly injured may have created some of my stupidity when I was leaving the park.
don't get it
Last week, my mileage was pretty low comparatively speaking. I think I barely hit 20 miles. This week will be even less. The taper before a race is kinda nice. So far I'm not getting that "I really should be running more" feeling, but we will see. The hunger isn't as bad as it was a week or so ago, and maybe that explains what I'm confused about.
Last week, I attempted to follow the weight watchers core plan. I didn't really count the stuff that I ate that wasn't on core, I allowed myself to eat low fat cheese and vanilla soy milk without counting it. I ate out with friends and ordered what I wanted. I ate bites of dessert (mmmmm...nutella crepe...mmmmm). I drank alcohol (had to celebrate passing my second bar - yep passed Illinois, I'm gonna be double barred). Essentially, what I'm saying is that I didn't really follow the plan at all. I didn't feel guilty about it and I didn't eat until stuffed, and I generally ate healthy foods (fruit, veggies, low fat cheese, meat and whole grains), but certainly shouldn't have lost any weight. But I did. I don't really know how this happened, and I'm convinced that its just a fluxuation and that tomorrow I'll be up a pound or so. I hope I'm wrong and that kinda sort of following core, when putting in some semi-serious millage (20 miles in a week is nothing to sneeze at), works. Still, I don't get it.
Weight: 157.6 (official ww weight)
Miles: 6 (well, that's what I'm running tonight to kinda sort of make up for the 8 I was supposed to run yesterday in combination with the 2 that are in my dayplanner).
Last week, I attempted to follow the weight watchers core plan. I didn't really count the stuff that I ate that wasn't on core, I allowed myself to eat low fat cheese and vanilla soy milk without counting it. I ate out with friends and ordered what I wanted. I ate bites of dessert (mmmmm...nutella crepe...mmmmm). I drank alcohol (had to celebrate passing my second bar - yep passed Illinois, I'm gonna be double barred). Essentially, what I'm saying is that I didn't really follow the plan at all. I didn't feel guilty about it and I didn't eat until stuffed, and I generally ate healthy foods (fruit, veggies, low fat cheese, meat and whole grains), but certainly shouldn't have lost any weight. But I did. I don't really know how this happened, and I'm convinced that its just a fluxuation and that tomorrow I'll be up a pound or so. I hope I'm wrong and that kinda sort of following core, when putting in some semi-serious millage (20 miles in a week is nothing to sneeze at), works. Still, I don't get it.
Weight: 157.6 (official ww weight)
Miles: 6 (well, that's what I'm running tonight to kinda sort of make up for the 8 I was supposed to run yesterday in combination with the 2 that are in my dayplanner).
Sunday, April 08, 2007
I don't wanna
I don't wanna run. I skipped my run today and yesterday, and I should feel bad about it, but I didn't want to run. I'm gonna do the park tomorrow after work, its a shorter run than I was supposed to do today, but I think its good enough to keep my cardio up.
Its funny cause on Friday they closed the office early so I could have gotten some good exercise in. Instead, I went by the bike shop and picked up my bike. I also hit the bank to get some cash for the weekend, and then went home for the night. I sat on my butt doing nothing, and I couldn't help but think that I should have stopped at the gym on my way home. It was cold and windy on Friday and I wasn't supposed to run, so it wasn't a great day to take out my bike. That's what I wanted to do, but I don't like wind. I hate wind. I really just felt like I had missed a great opportunity to be active on an afternoon that I felt like working out.
I feel lazy for skipping my run today. I slept in, went to an Easter dinner at 1, and then when I came home, I just watched an America's Next Top Model marathon on MTV. AHH - it felt like a weekend. I'm very excited about Cathy coming here next weekend, but I'm also very ready to not feel obligated to run.
Weight: 160
Miles: ug supposed to run 8, but ran none. I'm scheduled to run 2 tomorrow, but think I will do 5.75 instead. After that I'm sticking to the schedule this week.
Its funny cause on Friday they closed the office early so I could have gotten some good exercise in. Instead, I went by the bike shop and picked up my bike. I also hit the bank to get some cash for the weekend, and then went home for the night. I sat on my butt doing nothing, and I couldn't help but think that I should have stopped at the gym on my way home. It was cold and windy on Friday and I wasn't supposed to run, so it wasn't a great day to take out my bike. That's what I wanted to do, but I don't like wind. I hate wind. I really just felt like I had missed a great opportunity to be active on an afternoon that I felt like working out.
I feel lazy for skipping my run today. I slept in, went to an Easter dinner at 1, and then when I came home, I just watched an America's Next Top Model marathon on MTV. AHH - it felt like a weekend. I'm very excited about Cathy coming here next weekend, but I'm also very ready to not feel obligated to run.
Weight: 160
Miles: ug supposed to run 8, but ran none. I'm scheduled to run 2 tomorrow, but think I will do 5.75 instead. After that I'm sticking to the schedule this week.
Saturday, April 07, 2007
women's issues
Today I got the Gardasil vaccine. This makes me nervous. I got it because I know more than one woman who has already had abnormal pap results at the age of 26. I got it because I know at least a couple women who have had to have surgery out of fear of cervical cancer. I got it because I have not yet had an abnormal pap, and I would like to avoid getting a perfectly preventable cancer.
But, it still freaks me out. I think it freaks me out because it appears that women's health means so much less to our doctors and researchers than men's health. If HPV was a virus that cause cancer in men, that potentially could cause men to die, that cannot be stopped by using a condom, and was far too common in the general population, don't you think that the scientists and doctors would have come up with a test for it by now? A girl can be having the safest possible sex, force her boyfriend to get std tested, and even make him wear a condom, and she can get a disease that can kill her if left untreated. Why isn't there a test for men? Doesn't this seem wrong. Women aren't just giving HPV to each other, and women are only tested for HPV if their paps come back abnormal. We know what the strains are that cause cancer, why isn't there a test?
I also am freaked out about Gardasil because we don't know what the long term side effects are. The medical profession routinely recommended that menopausal women go on hormone replacement therapy, only to years later discover that it increased the risk of breast cancer. Almost every menopausal woman was put on these drugs without knowing the risk that she was subjecting herself to. No long term studies have been done on the risk associated with Gardasil, but I couldn't wait for studies - I have to get the vaccine now. In just a few months, I'll be 27 and the FDA has only approved it for women up to the age of 26. If I waited, I couldn't get it or certainly my heath insurance wouldn't cover it. Will we find out in 5 years that Gardisil also creates an increased risk of other, more deadly, cancers? It freaks me out because there's so much we just don't know yet about this vaccine.
But, I decided it was worth it for me. The known risks are minimal - some tenderness, maybe some pain in my arm. I have great insurance so I can get the vaccine at only the cost of three copays - $60. I am a sexually active woman in my twenties. If I don't already have HPV, I'll likely get it. I think something like 90% of all sexually active women have HPV (though most don't have the forms that cause cervical cancer - and don't quote me on that statistic, I made it up). Most women don't know how prevalent HPV is. They don't know that isn't tested for when you get standard std tests. They don't know that condoms are fully effective.
I was going to add something about abstinence only education here, but political views are a no no for me. Be glad to share my views if you know me, but can't do it here
But, it still freaks me out. I think it freaks me out because it appears that women's health means so much less to our doctors and researchers than men's health. If HPV was a virus that cause cancer in men, that potentially could cause men to die, that cannot be stopped by using a condom, and was far too common in the general population, don't you think that the scientists and doctors would have come up with a test for it by now? A girl can be having the safest possible sex, force her boyfriend to get std tested, and even make him wear a condom, and she can get a disease that can kill her if left untreated. Why isn't there a test for men? Doesn't this seem wrong. Women aren't just giving HPV to each other, and women are only tested for HPV if their paps come back abnormal. We know what the strains are that cause cancer, why isn't there a test?
I also am freaked out about Gardasil because we don't know what the long term side effects are. The medical profession routinely recommended that menopausal women go on hormone replacement therapy, only to years later discover that it increased the risk of breast cancer. Almost every menopausal woman was put on these drugs without knowing the risk that she was subjecting herself to. No long term studies have been done on the risk associated with Gardasil, but I couldn't wait for studies - I have to get the vaccine now. In just a few months, I'll be 27 and the FDA has only approved it for women up to the age of 26. If I waited, I couldn't get it or certainly my heath insurance wouldn't cover it. Will we find out in 5 years that Gardisil also creates an increased risk of other, more deadly, cancers? It freaks me out because there's so much we just don't know yet about this vaccine.
But, I decided it was worth it for me. The known risks are minimal - some tenderness, maybe some pain in my arm. I have great insurance so I can get the vaccine at only the cost of three copays - $60. I am a sexually active woman in my twenties. If I don't already have HPV, I'll likely get it. I think something like 90% of all sexually active women have HPV (though most don't have the forms that cause cervical cancer - and don't quote me on that statistic, I made it up). Most women don't know how prevalent HPV is. They don't know that isn't tested for when you get standard std tests. They don't know that condoms are fully effective.
I was going to add something about abstinence only education here, but political views are a no no for me. Be glad to share my views if you know me, but can't do it here
Thursday, April 05, 2007
If you could...
Not that long ago, I was out at a restaurant sitting around a big round table with a group of people I didn't know (well, I knew one other person at the table, but even him, not so much). The discussion turned into one of those almost never have I ever conversations, but clearly no one really wanted to get into that discussion unless there was a lot more alcohol available. So, the subject changed, and one guy asked - if you could change anything about yourself, physical or personality wise, what would you change?
Its a tough question. Not to sound cocky or whatever, but I generally like me. I wouldn't really change the person that I am, and I generally am alright with my looks. The biggie is probably my weight, but magically being 20 pounds thinner wouldn't help too much cause well, as long as I didn't change my eating habits, I would just gain it right back. So I thought for a bit and decided I would change my metabolism. I know I was blessed with a terrible metabolism. I'm from a family of overweight people who have been born to overweight people. In addition to genetics, I wasn't active or athletic as a child and that just sets you up for such a great metabolism later in life. So that's what I would change. It wouldn't solve the problem, but it would put me on a more level playing field.
So, what would you change if you could change anything about yourself?
Miles to run: 6 (skipped my run yesterday so I could take my bike in to the shop for its spring tune up)
Weight: 159
Its a tough question. Not to sound cocky or whatever, but I generally like me. I wouldn't really change the person that I am, and I generally am alright with my looks. The biggie is probably my weight, but magically being 20 pounds thinner wouldn't help too much cause well, as long as I didn't change my eating habits, I would just gain it right back. So I thought for a bit and decided I would change my metabolism. I know I was blessed with a terrible metabolism. I'm from a family of overweight people who have been born to overweight people. In addition to genetics, I wasn't active or athletic as a child and that just sets you up for such a great metabolism later in life. So that's what I would change. It wouldn't solve the problem, but it would put me on a more level playing field.
So, what would you change if you could change anything about yourself?
Miles to run: 6 (skipped my run yesterday so I could take my bike in to the shop for its spring tune up)
Weight: 159
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
degrading
Lately, there has been quite a discussion out there about how people like me are "degrading" the sport of running. It seems that "elite" runners are offended by people who run a five hour marathon. That what we do somehow makes running a marathon mean less. I've read this statement on a couple of blogs, and in fact, there was actually a long article on this published not too long ago on Slate http://www.slate.com/id/2149867
It offended me.
I have quite a lot to say about the idea that slow runners are degrading the marathon. In no other sport can I think of athletes complaining because there is increased public participation. I'm convinced that people who feel that way aren't truly elite runners. Does Tiger Woods think that the sport of golf is being degraded by my dad (who while a lovely person is not a lovely golfer) playing on the same course? Does anyone in the NBA think that pick up games on a street corner make their games mean less? Of course not. Slow marathoners don't hurt sub-two and a half hour marathoners at all. The achievement is just as great. Instead, the people who are hurt are the sort of fast marathoners. Just being able to run a marathon today isn't quite as impressive because more people know that they can do it. Does this mean that they shouldn't be able to do it?
Next, I get angry because those people assume that runners like me don't put in the training. No, we just don't have the natural ability to be as fast. I actually may spend MORE time on my training than a runner who could do the half marathon in just over an hour. My long runs take a LONG time. Running for me is a commitment. I can't pound out 8 miles in an hour, nope, I've got to plan on that taking almost two. Claiming that we have degraded running because we don't push ourselves as hard (which some people do) fails to acknowledge that people who aren't innately gifted will be slower no matter how hard they push themselves.
Finally, is there anything wrong with just being a recreational runner? I really can't think of any other sport where better athletes are offended by people doing something for their health or just for the love of the sport. What I do has no bearing on how you should feel about running. Instead of making the sport better by pushing people out, naysayers like that guy on slate are actually HURTING the sport. They make it less accessible to the public and make runners appear to be elitists who don't want to play nice or make new friends.
The sport of running has changed and is changing. Slowness doesn't make the sport worse. While I would agree that the number of elite runners might have declined as the masses were joining, this doesn't mean that the influx on non-elites caused the result. Correlation does not equal causation - didn't they learn this basic rule of statistics? Elite runners are recruited into other sports - basketball, football, field hockey, soccer - that a lot of people enjoy more than running just for the sake of running. I personally believe this might be more of a cause than additional public participation. People like team activities - it makes them feel like more than they are individually. And, running ultimately is an individual activity. Even in a race or while running with friends, your true competition is yourself.
Alright, enough of a rant for today.
Weight: 159 (officially ww weight - I'm trying something different this week - the Core plan. All this running makes me hungry all the time).
Miles: 2ish yesterday, none today.
It offended me.
I have quite a lot to say about the idea that slow runners are degrading the marathon. In no other sport can I think of athletes complaining because there is increased public participation. I'm convinced that people who feel that way aren't truly elite runners. Does Tiger Woods think that the sport of golf is being degraded by my dad (who while a lovely person is not a lovely golfer) playing on the same course? Does anyone in the NBA think that pick up games on a street corner make their games mean less? Of course not. Slow marathoners don't hurt sub-two and a half hour marathoners at all. The achievement is just as great. Instead, the people who are hurt are the sort of fast marathoners. Just being able to run a marathon today isn't quite as impressive because more people know that they can do it. Does this mean that they shouldn't be able to do it?
Next, I get angry because those people assume that runners like me don't put in the training. No, we just don't have the natural ability to be as fast. I actually may spend MORE time on my training than a runner who could do the half marathon in just over an hour. My long runs take a LONG time. Running for me is a commitment. I can't pound out 8 miles in an hour, nope, I've got to plan on that taking almost two. Claiming that we have degraded running because we don't push ourselves as hard (which some people do) fails to acknowledge that people who aren't innately gifted will be slower no matter how hard they push themselves.
Finally, is there anything wrong with just being a recreational runner? I really can't think of any other sport where better athletes are offended by people doing something for their health or just for the love of the sport. What I do has no bearing on how you should feel about running. Instead of making the sport better by pushing people out, naysayers like that guy on slate are actually HURTING the sport. They make it less accessible to the public and make runners appear to be elitists who don't want to play nice or make new friends.
The sport of running has changed and is changing. Slowness doesn't make the sport worse. While I would agree that the number of elite runners might have declined as the masses were joining, this doesn't mean that the influx on non-elites caused the result. Correlation does not equal causation - didn't they learn this basic rule of statistics? Elite runners are recruited into other sports - basketball, football, field hockey, soccer - that a lot of people enjoy more than running just for the sake of running. I personally believe this might be more of a cause than additional public participation. People like team activities - it makes them feel like more than they are individually. And, running ultimately is an individual activity. Even in a race or while running with friends, your true competition is yourself.
Alright, enough of a rant for today.
Weight: 159 (officially ww weight - I'm trying something different this week - the Core plan. All this running makes me hungry all the time).
Miles: 2ish yesterday, none today.
Sunday, April 01, 2007
side effects
Its seems that I have inspired a number of my friends to begin running based upon my blog posts here. While my posts aren't always positive (ummm...see the last week) regarding my running experience, they generally point out the good aspects or involve minor complaining. I just thought I would give you all a realistic idea of what bad side effects I've had from running.
First, there are the feet issues. I've been lucky so far with my feet. I haven't lost a toenail (happens all the time if your shoes don't fit right - one of the reasons why it is seriously worth it to go to a running store to buy your first pair of running shoes). I also haven't had bad blister issues. For a while last year, I had developed a blister on the inside of my right pinky toe that wouldn't go away - from rubbing against the next toe. No one could explain why I was getting it. It healed up while I wasn't running last summer and miraculously hasn't made a reappearance this training season. Even so, that blister wasn't a big deal cause it didn't hurt. Just looked ugly. The main reason why I think I have been so lucky with blisters, even on my long runs, is that I wear good socks. Repeat after me..."Cotton is Rotten!" Cotton socks cause blisters and make your feet stink (I think if I wore cotton socks my next foot issue would be even worse). I love my Wright Socks - they are nice and thin and prevent blisters. Worth every penny.
But, both last year and this year I have developed a WEIRD foot reaction to running - pitted keratolysis. Its a wonderful bacterial infection that causes pits in the bottom of your feet. It doesn't hurt and its not contagious. But, it can cause VERY stinky feet. Amazingly my feet have actually been less stinky lately than they were when I didn't have this problem. I discovered I had this for the first time last year while I was getting a pedicure and pedicurist freaked out. Apparently, soaking your feet makes the pits get bigger and more noticeable. Before that, I had no idea, it really didn't hurt and my feet honestly weren't that stinky. I knew it didn't look like athlete's foot, so I went to the health center and got diagnosed. The treatment is easy: wash your feet with anti-bacteria soap at least 2 times a day and apply an antibiotic cream. This time, when I went to the dermatologist, I talked to him because the treatment wasn't working (I suspect the extra miles are just creating a happy breeding ground for the bacteria). I got myself prescribed some expensive gel antibiotic gel (yay health insurance!). So far this is probably my worst side effect from running. The problem isn't really the infection - nope, its the fact that I'm too embarrassed to get a pedicure until it clears up.
Other side effects are usually only on the days I do a long run (6+ miles) - knee and hip pain. My Ace reusable cold compress is one of my favorite things these days. My knees don't hurt while running, but maybe an hour to two hours later - OUCH! I told you that I walk like a drunk old person after a long run, and this is why.
So there's your warning. Running can hurt and make you mortified to go to a pedicurist, but its worth it.
Miles: 11.5 (2 hours 5 minutes - with a couple stops :-D)
Weight: 160 (boo hiss)
First, there are the feet issues. I've been lucky so far with my feet. I haven't lost a toenail (happens all the time if your shoes don't fit right - one of the reasons why it is seriously worth it to go to a running store to buy your first pair of running shoes). I also haven't had bad blister issues. For a while last year, I had developed a blister on the inside of my right pinky toe that wouldn't go away - from rubbing against the next toe. No one could explain why I was getting it. It healed up while I wasn't running last summer and miraculously hasn't made a reappearance this training season. Even so, that blister wasn't a big deal cause it didn't hurt. Just looked ugly. The main reason why I think I have been so lucky with blisters, even on my long runs, is that I wear good socks. Repeat after me..."Cotton is Rotten!" Cotton socks cause blisters and make your feet stink (I think if I wore cotton socks my next foot issue would be even worse). I love my Wright Socks - they are nice and thin and prevent blisters. Worth every penny.
But, both last year and this year I have developed a WEIRD foot reaction to running - pitted keratolysis. Its a wonderful bacterial infection that causes pits in the bottom of your feet. It doesn't hurt and its not contagious. But, it can cause VERY stinky feet. Amazingly my feet have actually been less stinky lately than they were when I didn't have this problem. I discovered I had this for the first time last year while I was getting a pedicure and pedicurist freaked out. Apparently, soaking your feet makes the pits get bigger and more noticeable. Before that, I had no idea, it really didn't hurt and my feet honestly weren't that stinky. I knew it didn't look like athlete's foot, so I went to the health center and got diagnosed. The treatment is easy: wash your feet with anti-bacteria soap at least 2 times a day and apply an antibiotic cream. This time, when I went to the dermatologist, I talked to him because the treatment wasn't working (I suspect the extra miles are just creating a happy breeding ground for the bacteria). I got myself prescribed some expensive gel antibiotic gel (yay health insurance!). So far this is probably my worst side effect from running. The problem isn't really the infection - nope, its the fact that I'm too embarrassed to get a pedicure until it clears up.
Other side effects are usually only on the days I do a long run (6+ miles) - knee and hip pain. My Ace reusable cold compress is one of my favorite things these days. My knees don't hurt while running, but maybe an hour to two hours later - OUCH! I told you that I walk like a drunk old person after a long run, and this is why.
So there's your warning. Running can hurt and make you mortified to go to a pedicurist, but its worth it.
Miles: 11.5 (2 hours 5 minutes - with a couple stops :-D)
Weight: 160 (boo hiss)
Friday, March 30, 2007
and fashion magazines are supposed to make us feel bad about ourselves
Last night on a whim, I purchased a Real Simple magazine. My thought process at the grocery store checkout was something like, eh, that magazine is supposed to be good and hey, I'm moving into my own place soon so ideas on how to have a real simple life would be good.
I'm now convinced that magazine is designed solely for the purpose of making average people feel bad about themselves. Its sort of like Martha Stewart, only younger and hipper, and without the scandal. Some of the oh so wonderful tips that I'll be sure to add to my life include: making your own clock out of materials that cost over $100 (the clock uses chalkboard paint and you get to write in the numbers with chalk) and suggesting that you not purchase wipes or cleaning solution for your stainless steel appliances, but instead make your own cleaning solution. Ummm...yeah...honestly, who has time for this shit? I was actually extremely happy with myself when I bought some wipes to keep in my bathroom so I could clean up my makeup mess every day. Wipes are our friends...its not like the were suggesting making your own cleaner to be environmentally friendly, I think it was supposed to save you time and money. Ummm...no, it just means that my kitchen would look gross all the time.
Really, perhaps I'm just too lazy. Maybe people really do use clocks as bookends or make broaches into magnets to make their fridges look prettier or spend $800 on a trench coat. Its good to know that people care about this kind of stuff (though I suspect that the largest market for this crazy household thing is not yuppy housewives, but 30 year old gay men instead). Ultimately though, I think most people buy the magazine to feel like they are part of the aestetic, part of the crowd of "simple" living folks.
I really shouldn't judge this crowd. I'm not much of simple liver myself. I like my modern conveniences, and hell, I bought a magazine called Real Simple thinking that it would help me be organized and clean and such in my new apartment with KK. I should have known that's not really how things work. Next time, I'll save myself the trouble and just buy a People instead ;-) at least then I'll only feel fat, not fat and lazy...
Weight: 160 (fuuuuuck!!)
Miles: 3 (31:04)
I'm now convinced that magazine is designed solely for the purpose of making average people feel bad about themselves. Its sort of like Martha Stewart, only younger and hipper, and without the scandal. Some of the oh so wonderful tips that I'll be sure to add to my life include: making your own clock out of materials that cost over $100 (the clock uses chalkboard paint and you get to write in the numbers with chalk) and suggesting that you not purchase wipes or cleaning solution for your stainless steel appliances, but instead make your own cleaning solution. Ummm...yeah...honestly, who has time for this shit? I was actually extremely happy with myself when I bought some wipes to keep in my bathroom so I could clean up my makeup mess every day. Wipes are our friends...its not like the were suggesting making your own cleaner to be environmentally friendly, I think it was supposed to save you time and money. Ummm...no, it just means that my kitchen would look gross all the time.
Really, perhaps I'm just too lazy. Maybe people really do use clocks as bookends or make broaches into magnets to make their fridges look prettier or spend $800 on a trench coat. Its good to know that people care about this kind of stuff (though I suspect that the largest market for this crazy household thing is not yuppy housewives, but 30 year old gay men instead). Ultimately though, I think most people buy the magazine to feel like they are part of the aestetic, part of the crowd of "simple" living folks.
I really shouldn't judge this crowd. I'm not much of simple liver myself. I like my modern conveniences, and hell, I bought a magazine called Real Simple thinking that it would help me be organized and clean and such in my new apartment with KK. I should have known that's not really how things work. Next time, I'll save myself the trouble and just buy a People instead ;-) at least then I'll only feel fat, not fat and lazy...
Weight: 160 (fuuuuuck!!)
Miles: 3 (31:04)
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
sigh - no running today
To answer your question, Elisabeth - yes, I do like running sometimes. Sometimes I even love it. I feel better after I do it and I generally feel better about myself knowing that I am a runner. That being said, some days, I hate it, and I only run because the runs are written in my day planner.
Speaking of written in my day planner, I am supposed to run 5 miles tonight, but its not gonna happen. I had a doctors appointment at 11:15 this morning with a dermatologist. My OBGYN had freaked me out about one mole, plus I've got some feet issues from running that needed a prescription. I didn't think that the dermatologist would do anything today, though cause the mole my new OBGYN was freaked out about was a mole that I have had at least since I was 13 years old. Generally, if they have been around that long (even if they are big), you don't have much to worry about. I did have another mole that has been worrying me for some time, but I kept being assured by docs (like the above OBGYN) that it wasn't big enough to worry about. So I assumed the derm would take a look at the moles, give me a prescription for the feet and send me on my way. No such luck.
Right now my shoulder feels like I slept on it badly because I had two moles removed. My whole shoulder/neck area hurts - guess the local he gave me didn't last all afternoon. The derm ended up taking off two moles and is sending them off to be biopsied. One on the front of my shoulder (the one that concerned me but not my other doc) and a mole on my back that I didn't even know was there. The derm assured me that I really shouldn't worry and that likely everything will come out hunky dory. I'm not at all stressed about the mole biopsy process - other than the fact that I once had a super super bad burn on my shoulders - but I think running is out for tonight. My shoulder hurts too much. Hopefully I can run these five tomorrow night instead.
Speaking of written in my day planner, I am supposed to run 5 miles tonight, but its not gonna happen. I had a doctors appointment at 11:15 this morning with a dermatologist. My OBGYN had freaked me out about one mole, plus I've got some feet issues from running that needed a prescription. I didn't think that the dermatologist would do anything today, though cause the mole my new OBGYN was freaked out about was a mole that I have had at least since I was 13 years old. Generally, if they have been around that long (even if they are big), you don't have much to worry about. I did have another mole that has been worrying me for some time, but I kept being assured by docs (like the above OBGYN) that it wasn't big enough to worry about. So I assumed the derm would take a look at the moles, give me a prescription for the feet and send me on my way. No such luck.
Right now my shoulder feels like I slept on it badly because I had two moles removed. My whole shoulder/neck area hurts - guess the local he gave me didn't last all afternoon. The derm ended up taking off two moles and is sending them off to be biopsied. One on the front of my shoulder (the one that concerned me but not my other doc) and a mole on my back that I didn't even know was there. The derm assured me that I really shouldn't worry and that likely everything will come out hunky dory. I'm not at all stressed about the mole biopsy process - other than the fact that I once had a super super bad burn on my shoulders - but I think running is out for tonight. My shoulder hurts too much. Hopefully I can run these five tomorrow night instead.
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
spring in my step
So, I figured out what's wrong with the half marathon training - lack of joy in my running at about mile 6. Thinking back to Sunday, I was actually having fun through at the very least, mile 5. I was dancing along as I ran, enjoying the random music that came through my ipod. I was so enthusiastic in my joy that I got smiles and laughs from bikers I passed on the trail. It was fun; I didn't mind the heat or the slight soreness in my butt or the tiny rocks in my shoes. And then, suddenly it wasn't fun anymore. My legs and butt hurt; I was hot; I was thirsty. I wasn't playing anymore, instead, I was training.
I realized this last night when I found myself singing along with Simon and Garfunkel about twenty minutes into my run. I was alone in a gym, on a treadmill, and I was having more fun than I did in those painful miles outside on a perfect Sunday afternoon. I like running 3 miles; I even like running 6 miles, but much more than that is real work and so far I haven't developed a real love for it. Its not the time either - I can spend four hours biking with minor breaks for food and still love every minute of it. No, its the pain. Running 10 miles hurts. Maybe someday, if I keep running long training runs it won't hurt so much, but I'm not sure I want to get past that point. I'm not sure I'm willing to put in that kind of time.
I want to get back to joyful running, to enjoying the movement, to have the freedom to run three miles and stop or to push on to six, to have the freedom to skip a Sunday run and take my bike out instead, to not be afraid that going rock climbing is going to leave me with too much muscle pain to run. I'm ready to run for the love of running again instead of because I have to.
Weight: 157.5
Miles: 0 for today - might hit the rock climbing gym tonight.
I realized this last night when I found myself singing along with Simon and Garfunkel about twenty minutes into my run. I was alone in a gym, on a treadmill, and I was having more fun than I did in those painful miles outside on a perfect Sunday afternoon. I like running 3 miles; I even like running 6 miles, but much more than that is real work and so far I haven't developed a real love for it. Its not the time either - I can spend four hours biking with minor breaks for food and still love every minute of it. No, its the pain. Running 10 miles hurts. Maybe someday, if I keep running long training runs it won't hurt so much, but I'm not sure I want to get past that point. I'm not sure I'm willing to put in that kind of time.
I want to get back to joyful running, to enjoying the movement, to have the freedom to run three miles and stop or to push on to six, to have the freedom to skip a Sunday run and take my bike out instead, to not be afraid that going rock climbing is going to leave me with too much muscle pain to run. I'm ready to run for the love of running again instead of because I have to.
Weight: 157.5
Miles: 0 for today - might hit the rock climbing gym tonight.
Monday, March 26, 2007
lesson learned
(1) Body glide is my friend. I bought body glide last year because my big clunky ipod was causing chafing when I was running. Since I replaced the big clunky ipod, I hadn't needed the body glide anymore. Now, I need it again. Even wearing capri running tights, I still managed to get chafed in my inner thighs and lower butt. Its not cute, but its the truth. Next time I go for a long run, I will apply body glide ahead of time (for those who don't know, body glide is a ant-friction thing that comes in a container that looks like deoderant - people apply it to prevent blisters on the feet and chafing everywhere else - I've heard that its really loved by people in the military who have feet issues).
(2) I need water. I thought I was gonna die before I got to the restaurant where I bought water at mile 7 yesterday. There were no water fountains and I wasn't carrying any water on my body. At one point the stream/drainage ditch running next to the Katy trail actually looked inviting. On my way back, I was heartbroken by a coke vending machine that didn't work - I still had 2 miles to get back to my car and I had been dreaming about that coke since about miles 10.
(3) Vanilla bean Gu is more gross than Vanilla Powergels. I won't go so far as to say that Vanilla Powergels are better because they are both gross, but Gu is worse.
(4) I don't like running on a long flat trail. Its boring; I get rocks in my shoes (and that really sucks), and its hot - very little shade.
(5) I don't like running in the heat. Yesterday was probably about 85 degrees in St. Louis. I already knew I didn't like running in the heat, its why I didn't run most of last summer. But, having it reconfirmed was a good thing. I'd much rather run in 19 degree temps than 90 degree ones. I know this is weird, but its true. When its hot out there are so many things I'd rather be doing than running, whereas when its cold, running is sort of my only option (its not like we get a lot of snow here).
(6) I'm really ready for this half marathon to be over. In fact, if Cathy weren't signed up to do it with me, I might back out at this point. I miss having my weekends free and being able to enjoy a gorgeous afternoon by peddeling away on my bike. I miss my bike. I hate having to devote almost my entire Sunday to running. I don't want to get up early, but then I have to plan everything else around my long run for the day and after I'm finished, I'm kind of useless. Next weekend I'm going to try to do my long run early in the morning on either Saturday or Sunday with a friend. Maybe then I could have some of my Sunday back.
Weight: 157.5 (I'm joining ww at work today, don't know if I will be able to do it until the half is over, but I'm going to try)
Miles: 2 (to run)
(2) I need water. I thought I was gonna die before I got to the restaurant where I bought water at mile 7 yesterday. There were no water fountains and I wasn't carrying any water on my body. At one point the stream/drainage ditch running next to the Katy trail actually looked inviting. On my way back, I was heartbroken by a coke vending machine that didn't work - I still had 2 miles to get back to my car and I had been dreaming about that coke since about miles 10.
(3) Vanilla bean Gu is more gross than Vanilla Powergels. I won't go so far as to say that Vanilla Powergels are better because they are both gross, but Gu is worse.
(4) I don't like running on a long flat trail. Its boring; I get rocks in my shoes (and that really sucks), and its hot - very little shade.
(5) I don't like running in the heat. Yesterday was probably about 85 degrees in St. Louis. I already knew I didn't like running in the heat, its why I didn't run most of last summer. But, having it reconfirmed was a good thing. I'd much rather run in 19 degree temps than 90 degree ones. I know this is weird, but its true. When its hot out there are so many things I'd rather be doing than running, whereas when its cold, running is sort of my only option (its not like we get a lot of snow here).
(6) I'm really ready for this half marathon to be over. In fact, if Cathy weren't signed up to do it with me, I might back out at this point. I miss having my weekends free and being able to enjoy a gorgeous afternoon by peddeling away on my bike. I miss my bike. I hate having to devote almost my entire Sunday to running. I don't want to get up early, but then I have to plan everything else around my long run for the day and after I'm finished, I'm kind of useless. Next weekend I'm going to try to do my long run early in the morning on either Saturday or Sunday with a friend. Maybe then I could have some of my Sunday back.
Weight: 157.5 (I'm joining ww at work today, don't know if I will be able to do it until the half is over, but I'm going to try)
Miles: 2 (to run)
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Announcements! Announcements!
This was a big weekend for me:
- I signed a lease on a new apartment! It is beautiful and has everything I have wanted, everything. And I'm going to have a roommate - my friend kk, who I have known since preschool. I'm paying probably more than I should be for a two bedroom apartment that I will share with a roommate, but I love everything about it. It's on the street I've been longing to live on for years, within walking distance of a wine bar, a nice restaurant with a nice bar, and my favorite coffee shop. It has central air, hardwood floors in the main living areas, my bedroom has a separate office, I have my own bathroom, and the kitchen...ahhh the kitchen. The kitchen is beautiful - hardwood floors, granite countertops, stainless steel appliances, gas stove, built in microwave, full size side by side fridge, and a closet with a stackable full size washer and dryer. I can't wait for June 1! She and I have already talked about some of the rules we need (well, that she needs for me - dishes must be in the dishwasher within 24 hours of being used).
- I traveled 14 miles on foot today. I can't say that I ran it because I walked the last 5 miles or so because I got sick at mile seven (not caused by the running...)
- When rock climbing again last Thursday. I discovered that Thursdays are ladies night at the rock climbing gym. I did so much better this time on the wall. I made it to the top more than once and really felt great about myself.
Anyway, I'm gross from the run.
Miles: 14!!!!!
Weight: 159
- I signed a lease on a new apartment! It is beautiful and has everything I have wanted, everything. And I'm going to have a roommate - my friend kk, who I have known since preschool. I'm paying probably more than I should be for a two bedroom apartment that I will share with a roommate, but I love everything about it. It's on the street I've been longing to live on for years, within walking distance of a wine bar, a nice restaurant with a nice bar, and my favorite coffee shop. It has central air, hardwood floors in the main living areas, my bedroom has a separate office, I have my own bathroom, and the kitchen...ahhh the kitchen. The kitchen is beautiful - hardwood floors, granite countertops, stainless steel appliances, gas stove, built in microwave, full size side by side fridge, and a closet with a stackable full size washer and dryer. I can't wait for June 1! She and I have already talked about some of the rules we need (well, that she needs for me - dishes must be in the dishwasher within 24 hours of being used).
- I traveled 14 miles on foot today. I can't say that I ran it because I walked the last 5 miles or so because I got sick at mile seven (not caused by the running...)
- When rock climbing again last Thursday. I discovered that Thursdays are ladies night at the rock climbing gym. I did so much better this time on the wall. I made it to the top more than once and really felt great about myself.
Anyway, I'm gross from the run.
Miles: 14!!!!!
Weight: 159
Thursday, March 22, 2007
proud of my hometown team...
http://msn.foxsports.com/mlb/story/6596608?MSNHPHMA
Ah, what a way to show the world how classy the team is after winning to world series last October.
Ah, what a way to show the world how classy the team is after winning to world series last October.
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